We were waiting at the Eurostar station for our train to France when we popped into a bookshop. I spotted this book. I'd been wanting to read it for a while as we had studied Hosseini's other book 'The Kite Runner' in school and I had enjoyed it. I bought it along with 'The Kabul Beauty School'. Have any of you read any of these books?
A Thousand Splendid Suns is amazingly written and I couldn't put it down. I honestly read it in about 3 days! I've been reading a lot about Afghanistan recently and it's really intriguing reading about other cultures.
This is a heartbreaking story of two women who are victims to their gender and face oppression from their parents, husbands, communities and the Taliban. An eye opening account to the reality of life in Afghanistan during the Russian invasion and Taliban rule. The two women, Mariam and Laila, are true heroines and despite their experiences of violence, starvation, oppression and loss, they demonstrate the unceasing limits to which a mother will go out of love for her children.
One of the issues raised in this book is child marriage, and girls being married to men who are much older than they are. In the developing world in particular this is a huge problem with one in every three girls being married by the age of 18, and one in every seven by the time she is 15.
I've used this old photo of my year 10 class to demonstrate this. If we lived in a developing country, all the girls circled in red would be married by the time they were 18. All the girls circled in blue would be married by the time they were 15! They probably wouldn't have made it into this photo as they would have had to drop out of school after getting married and take up their duties as a housewife. That leaves about half of us to finish school. When you relate the statistics to your own situation, it shocks you even more. Now I am aware that some statistics about this vary, with some saying that it is 1 in 9 girls marrying by the age of 15. However my point remains the same. It shouldn't be happening. It should be 0 in 3 girls, 0 in 7 girls, no girl should be forced to marry until she is ready to make that decision herself.
I think A Thousand Splendid Suns is so compelling because as you read it, a sense of injustice stirs within you and you want to see whether the characters overcome what holds them back. You are led to question why such tragedy and oppression is allowed to happen in this world. And why they so often go unnoticed. Dismissed as 'culture' or 'tradition', people are too scared to speak out about such issues as child marriage because they feel they will offend a religion or community.
But there is a difference between tradition and oppression.
The Afghan marital practice of the bride and groom sitting side by side, and looking at each other in a mirror, is a tradition. It is a precious moment for the couple to share on their big day. However when the bride is only 13 and the mirror reveals her 45 year old husband's face, something is not right.
The Hindu tradition of the couple conducting seven circuits of the Holy Fire, is considered a witness to the vows they make to each other. It is an important part of the ceremony. However when the bride has been forced to drop out of school and give up her education, against her will, to get married, we're looking at injustice.
At Christian weddings, the guests used to throw rice over the couple (nowadays we use confetti) as a sign of fertility. But when the grains shower down on a young boy, who doesn't really know what is going on and whose parents have chosen his wife, things need to change.
Child marriage does happen to both boys and girls, however it is primarily girls who are forced to marry older men. Sometime soon I will write a whole blog on this, but for now - back to the book!
It strikes me how resilient the two main characters of the book are. They go through so much but they do not let it defeat them. I really admire their patience and I don't think I would last as long as they do in that house! I would definitely recommend this book to anyone and everyone. It really opens your eyes about life in Afghanistan. All we ever see on the news is the governments and the soldiers, however this book gives a real insight into how the people and families were affected. It makes you appreciate the freedom that we have in this country, especially in regards to the treatment of women. Go out now and get it from the library. Or find it online. Or I'll lend it to you. Just read it. (and then let me know what you thought!)
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